*~*Bully by Penelope Douglas Blog Tour – Excerpt from Until You & Giveaway*~*

Title:    Bully

Series:    A Fall Away Novel, Book #1

Author:    Penelope Douglas

Genre:    New Adult Contemporary Romance

Release Date:    June 17, 2013

Tour Organized by:    As the Pages Turn

My name is Tate. He doesn’t call me that, though. He would never refer to me so informally, if he referred to me at all. No, he’ll barely even speak to me.

But he still won’t leave me alone.

We were best friends once. Then he turned on me and made it his mission to ruin my life. I’ve been humiliated, shut out, and gossiped about all through high school. His pranks and rumors got more sadistic as time wore on, and I made myself sick trying to stay out of his way. I even went to France for a year, just to avoid him.

But I’m done hiding from him now, and there’s no way in hell I’ll allow him to ruin my senior year. He might not have changed, but I have. It’s time to fight back.

*This novel contains adult/mature young adult situations. It is only suitable for ages 18+ due to language, violence, and sexual situations.

**This book is the first in a series but can be read as a STAND ALONE. The next books will focus on side characters from this story.

More Good News?  Bully is on sale right now!  Only 99 cents and you will not regret one cent!

Bully ROCKED my face off SO much…so of course I’m super excited about Until You, Jared’s P.O.V.  Want a little sneak peak?  Yes…trust me…you do!

 

“Jared?”

I hear her whisper in my ear, and want to crawl up inside of her voice. Her love.  

“Jared?” She takes my hand and guides it up her thighs to her heat. “Do you feel me?”

God, her whisper is desperate. She’s raspy and breathless as if she’s lost all control and will spill over the edge. Like the thread holding desire and tears at bay, because at any moment she will break and beg for what she wants. The ache is torture.

I open my eyes and see the blue ones I was hoping for, wanting me. Her lip trembles and a light sheen of sweat makes her face glow. She is fire and need in the most beautiful girl I have ever seen.

“Tate?”My voice cracks, not believing she’s letting me touch her like this.

“Do you feel how much I want you? You. Always you, baby,” she pleads and rests her forehead on my chin, and I close my eyes, violent in my need to live in this moment forever.  

My skin feels electrified as her hand rests on my jeans, over my dick that I can’t seem to get to stay down around her.

“You want me, too,” she moans, the tip of her tongue leaving a wet, hot trail over my jaw. “I can feel it. Don’t push me away. You’re in my blood, my skin. I miss you so much. I love you.”

My eyes snap open, and I thread my fingers through her hair and hold her head up to face me. “You love me?” I ask wildly. My fists tighten in her hair.

She doesn’t love me. She can’t.

“Always you. Always yours. Now, take it,” she orders.

I can’t stand the hunger anymore, and I seize what’s mine. I eat up her sweet lips, and we melt in sweat and heat and want nothing except to dive into this dangerous urgency for each other.

I want it all. All of her. 

“Are you okay?” a voice, strong and clear, breaks through.

“What?”

I blinked and found myself still in the bathroom, my forehead resting on the shoulder of another girl. My eyelashes felt thick and there was a blur.

What the fuck?

Was I crying?

Jesus Christ. Mother–

“Are you okay?” someone asked again.

Standing up straight, I looked down at the girl I’d been about to have sex with. Brown eyes stared back at me.

Nausea rolled viciously through my stomach, the alcohol shifting my body from a pleasant fog to agony.

“No, I’m not okay.” I turned to grip the sink ledge. “Just go on out. I’m feeling sick.”

“Do you want me to get someone?”

“Just go!” I shouted, and she slipped out the door quickly, while I closed my eyes and hardened every muscle in my body, willing the sickness to disappear.

But after a few seconds, I was fucking done. Here I was, hold up in the bathroom, practically in fucking tears! And why?

Out of control. That’s what I was.

Always out of control.

Picking my toothbrush out of the holder, I jammed it down my throat and emptied everything I’d eaten today into the toilet. Most of it was the alcohol of the last four hours, and it burned like hell as I placed my palms against the wall and leaned over, wrenching.

“Jared, you okay?” someone burst in.

“Goddmamit! Can’t people just leave me the fuck alone!” I yelled and spit up the rest of what was coming up from my stomach.

Looking over and scowling, I noticed it was my brother.

Shit.

And he was shrinking away.

 “Jax,” I started but couldn’t finish. What could I say?

He didn’t speak again. Only looked away and backed out of the bathroom, closing the door.

And in that moment, I was no better than our fucking father.

I knew the look on his face. I’d seen it before. Hell, I’d even worn it myself. Too scared to meet my eyes. Leaving as quietly as you came. Trying to remain off the radar of the drunk lunatic.

I gargled some mouthwash, yanked off my sweaty t-shirt, and collapsed against the bathroom wall to rest.

I needed to calm down before I apologized to him. He couldn’t see me like that again. I stayed there a minute or two, trying to get my head straight before I faced him.

But as I stood up to leave the room, the entire house went dead. Lights out, music off, and all I heard were the loud barks of pissed off partiers.

“What the hell?” I felt my way out the bathroom door and to my bedroom.

Stumbling over the shit on my floor, I found a flashlight in the bedside table and switched it on.

It wasn’t storming out, and we paid our bills on time. Why the hell was the electricity out? Walking over to the window, I saw the Brandt’s porch light on, so I knew it wasn’t the neighborhood.

And then I saw Tate.

No. I zoned in on her like a bullet.

Her silhouette was behind her curtain, and I knew. I fucking knew what she did.

OMG…for the record…I ♥ being in Jared’s head.

 

 

Bully by Penelope Douglas

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

*ARC Given to Blog for Honest Review*

5 “Yesterday lasts forever.” Kisses

Sadness. Anger. Betrayal. Frustration. Lust. Happiness. Joy. Love. Do I sound like a crazy person yet? I’m not just listing these feelings cause I feel like it – I’m listing them because this book painstakingly ejected them from my soul while I read. After all that, I should be emotionally drained…but I’m not! I’m infused! I absolutely loved this book! GAH! Prepare for another babble filled rant of insanity from yours truly about a book that hypnotized, captivated and enraptured me. Apologies in advance.

Tatum Brandt…Tate…or at least that’s what everyone else calls her. Except for him. He’s always the exception. The one that lives to make her cringe, make her fearful of anything and everything, make her miserable. She’s a good girl, a pretty girl…she’s smart, does well in school, runs cross country, likes rock music – she’s unique! That’s one of the many things I liked about her…she’s not a girly girl, she’s not your typical teenager, but in all honesty…there’s nothing to dislike about Tate. But…of course, he can find any number of ways to make her miserable and for no reason at all…leave it to the one person who knows her the best to hurt her the worst. So, after being away for a year abroad, she comes back home to turn over a new leaf, start fresh, put the past behind her because nothing – not even the bully that has tormented her for years, is going to ruin her senior year.

“Everything still hurts, but I know none of it is my fault. There are a lot of words that I could use to describe you, but the only one that includes sad, angry, miserable, and pitiful is “coward.” In a year, I’ll be gone, and you’ll be nothing but some washout whose height of existence was in high school.” My eyes were still on Jared, and my voice got strong again. The ache in my face from trying to hold back tears eased. “You were my tempest, my thunder cloud, my tree in the downpour. I loved all those things, and I loved you. But now? You’re a fucking drought. I thought that all the assholes drove German cars, but it turns out that pricks in Mustangs can still leave scars.”

Jared Trent…oh how this boy toyed with my emotions. I wanted to hate him. Especially for the way he treated Tate, and especially because I didn’t know the reason. But once I knew the reason, all that possible hatred was gone – poof! Vanished into thin air because this poor, broken, sad boy doesn’t deserve anything but pure love in his life. He’s so the classic example of the strong silent type…and every time you get a glimpse inside, hear his emotions, his past, there’s just no hope. You cannot help but melt into a puddle at his feet and scream ‘TAKE ME NOW!’ Hmm…maybe it’s just me.

‘Once my gaze met his, it was impossible to look away. His eyes were like the cover of a book— giving you hints but not the whole story. And I wanted to know the story. If I searched his eyes long and hard enough, maybe what I craved would seep out.’

Tate and Jared clearly have a very complicated relationship. They have a lot of history, which is another thing that really gets me. They grew up together, were neighbors, he got her thru some really hard times, it’s hard not to cling to a past like that. You can’t fake memories and those threads that bind you to another person, be it a friend, a lover or a family member. And I loved the little flashbacks we got, those happy memories where you saw tiny pieces of them when they were growing up…their friendship and how it used to be before everything got ugly and feelings got hurt. That’s another reason why it was easy to see past what Jared did was because you knew that deep down, this wasn’t who he really was and there had to be a reason why he was acting the way he was. It just torture getting to that point!

‘His body inched closer, but I didn’t care. I wanted to hear more. “You were never clingy or a nuisance, Tate. The day you moved in next door I thought you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. I fucking love you.”’

I think part of the reason why this book and the emotions hit so deep with me was because it’s very relatable. We were all teenagers once, feelings those insecurities, those desires to just be liked, to have friends and feel cool. I know I experienced similar things to Tate, not to that extreme mind you but my heart broke for her because I knew what it felt like to have your dreams crushed, your heart broken, your desires smashed to smithereens and above all to feel so hopeless in the situation when you’ve done nothing wrong but still feel the punishment. I wanted to hold, hug and protect Tate because no one deserves that…least of all her. Not only that…but at some point we’ve all been bullied in one way or another and when it’s done by someone you considered a best friend….I mean that’s pretty freaking low. How can that not make you cry and break your heart.

‘He put a hand to my face and guided my eyes to his. “We never lost that. As much as I tried, I could never erase you from my heart. That’s why I was such an asshole and kept guys away from you. You were always mine.”
“Are you mine?” I asked as I wiped my tears.
He kissed the corners of my mouth softly, and I felt heat rise up my neck. “Always have been,” he whispered against my mouth.’

At the same time, once you learn the reasons behind Jared’s behavior and actions…is it justifiable? No. What he did was still fucked up, wrong and uncalled for. But…my heart did break for him too. These aren’t adults, their teenagers filled with pent up emotions, hormones and when you’re stuck in a situation you can’t fix or control, you do dumb things. The fact that he could sit back and recognize his mistake, apologize for it and make amends…that’s what makes him a decent guy. And you saw him trying to make up for his past and what he did, trying to mend things with Tate, to earn her forgiveness and trust, which only made me fall more in love with him! Gah, I’m such a sucker!

“You made me mean. And now I pummel poor, defenseless girls… and guys.” I tried to make my voice sound accusing and innocent.
Jared gripped me tighter. “If you beat metal long enough, it turns to steel.”
I buried my nose in his hair, kissing the ridge of his ear and joked. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, you big bully.”

Bully got me…it was sometimes difficult to remember they are seniors in high school…especially with Tate because she acts very mature for her age. I did love the ending…and the good news keeps coming cause this little gemstone is…drum roll please…a series! And what does Lisa love more than anything in this world? Series Books! Squee! I cannot wait to dive head first into Jared’s brain in Until You – and FYI, that title is fucking GENIUS and I love it more than words can ever express. Aaaaand that’s not all! Rival…Madoc’s story – Jared’s equally hot bff and he’s hilarious…love him. O…M…G….I just can’t wait. 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Penelope Douglas is a writer and teacher in Las Vegas. Born in Dubuque, Iowa, she is the oldest of five children. Penelope attended the University of Northern Iowa, earning a Bachelor’s degree in Public Administration, because her father told her to “just get the degree!” She then earned a Masters of Science in Education at Loyola University in New Orleans, because she hated Public Administration. One night, she got tipsy and told the bouncer at the bar where she worked that his son was hot, and three years later they were married. To the son, not the bouncer. They have spawn, but just one. A daughter named Aydan. Penelope loves sweets, the show Sons of Anarchy, and she shops at Target almost daily.